Like this:

While we were having tea with our Servas Host Barbara in the lobby of our Jerusalem hotel one evening,  she suddenly motioned for us to look at an attractive young couple who was sitting opposite each other on sofas nearby.  They were dressed sharply, yet conservatively – he in a dark suit and she in a dark, ancle-length skirt and jacket.  Her long black hair was pulled back; her make-up was meticulous.  They were deep in conversation.

Barbara explained that they were an Orthodox Jewish couple who had  probably just been introduced by a matchmaker or by their respective families.  Since Orthodox women must cover their heads once they marry, it was evident this couple wasn’t married.  Tradition dictates that their first meeting be in a public place; therefore a hotel lobby area is often chosen.

The intensity of the conversation that went on for over an hour intrigued us.  Barbara said they were undoubtedly discussing marriage issues such as how many children each wanted and whether or not the woman would need to work.

If, as a result of this meeting, they are interested in each other enough to continue exploring the possibility of marriage, they will have several  more similar meetings which may then be followed by an engagement.  All their meetings until their wedding night have to be within sight of other people.

Since then we have identified similar couples in other hotel lobbies in Israel.  Judging from the lovely Orthodox Jewish families we have observed, this traditional process of finding a marriage partner has stood the test of time.

Shalom

Merrilee

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